For context, I am leaving a very solemn relationship. My fiancé got me pregnant, raped me while pregnant, and I caught him sexting another woman this week. Am now being put through abortion because it’ll be our second baby (my third) and I just can’t do it without support.
It makes me ponder why men just only seek one thing. I swear I’ve never come across a Godly, endearing man who just wanted me because I was ME. No matter what kind of intention I put out there, how many boundaries I made, making sure I wouldn’t get hurt. I feel so used. It’s such a disgusting feeling. Sounding desperate is not my goal here but f*k , I’d wish someone could see me for who I was and not bring the surmount of bullshit that always revolves around sex. It is nauseating. I am more than my body. I want to be honored as so. I want to be honored as a wife, I did literally everything a wife should do for that man and it wasn’t ENOUGH because he was so sex crazed. And it’s not just him, it’s a societal issue, it’s fucking scary thinking I might not fulfill my job as a wife and mother. But if that means I don’t cave and give them what they want from me, then so be it. I yearn to be earned. 💔