How to de-sexualize myself?

Total acknowledgment that men need to do better equating clothes or body language as open invitations etc.

But I also want to answer the question a bit too. As a young SA survivor, I learned (from my interactions with people both negative and from caring friends, bfs etc) that I presented myself in a very coy and seductive way (subconsciously), all of the time.

Hell, I worked with a retired sex therapist (in an unrelated job she took for fun) who called me out when we were taking staff photos for the way I tilted my head to the side. A thing women very subconsciously (and sometimes not) do to show submission and it’s ingrained in us culturally. I was a particularly flamboyant example despite not intending it.

I met a girl once and instantly disliked her but couldn’t pinpoint why. Eventually figured out she had the same issue and I guess I felt mirrored, called out or like she was competition or something – again, subconsciously.

People pick up on subtle body language cues even when neither party might be able to articulate or pinpoint it.

This may not apply to you, but actively watching my body language changed how people treated me profoundly. It was a journey that took some time.

It’s a thing to think about if you think it might apply to you. I was also shy and modest, but that doesn’t equate to not sexual. In fact it aligns perfectly with coquettish sexual body language and is very appealing to more sexually aggressive men.