I’m an office worker and some of my personal favourites are…
‘I can’t be assed’
‘Fuck off’
‘For fuck sake’
‘I hate people’
‘I am going to perform a spell that was passed down to me from the son of a shaman who originated in Kenya, that will ensure all of your future children and their children’s children will be born with six toes and only be able to say sentences backwards and eventually be run out of the local village with pitchforks and flames, to live at the foot of a mountain alone, scared and afraid until they become part beast and are later classified by scientists as a new and weird species’.